To Err Is Human: Level up your thinking to unlock your potential

Today I shared a story about body language.

The coach was talking about how he would put money on the fact that a player will miss the next shot they attempt following an air ball if their body language on that air ball was “extra”.   

You’ve seen the "extra" before. Maybe even done it yourself.

I’ll set the stage…pick a sport, any sport. The player takes a shot, completely misses the target, immediately puts their head down in disgust, face in hands, trying to hide from the crowd/players/coaches/themselves.

Self talk sounds a little like this… “What the heck was that? What is wrong with me? Everyone saw that. They think I suck. I suck” etc.

As the player runs back to their defensive spot they shake their head in disappointment. Embarrassment. Shame. Of themselves. 

Then, in the next offensive possession, that same player gets a chance to shoot again. What’s gonna happen? My guess is 1 of 2 things. The player... shoots and misses.

Or. 

They pass it off to let someone else on their team set themselves up for failure. Not me again. Nope. Not gonna happen. Fool me once shame on you, fool me twice shame on me type of scenario.  

And all of this stemming from body language and allowing negative self talk to rule the player's world.  

Here’s how I see it. 

When we mess up as an athlete, we use our body language to communicate that we know we messed up and that we, too, are not happy about it. That we are even more upset than you, the spectator. We do this so that no one else claims the narrative but the athlete. We've all seen it. Cracking helmets, rackets, bats, after missed opportunities. 

How I see it?

A defense mechanism.  

We messed up, we're embarrassed by that mistake, and instead of allowing others to talk about it behind our back, we place our walls up and communicate directly after the play that we know we messed up, we also find this unacceptable, and are just as upset as all of you. Controlling the narrative.

And you know what? I get it.  

But you know who doesn’t get it? Our body.  

Our body will play based off the body language we allow it to give to the world.

No words need to be spoken. Our body and mind have locked in together to the fact that we tried something, we made a mistake, and we suck.  

But here's the important thing to remember here...we don't suck. We just made a mistake. To err is human, after all. And athletes, as much as no one wants to believe this, are human.

So here’s what I think.  

In every mistake, we have 2 choices.

We can choose to allow our body and mind to give in to the defense mechanism of perfection and show everyone we know we messed up. Hands in the air. Head down. Self talk a mess.  

Or.  

We allow our body and mind to reset. Head up. Shoulders back. Learn from this one. And get the next.  No emotions. Just facts.  

It's easier to give in to the negative. Option 1 makes so much sense. We are wired to be critical of ourselves for survival. Once we step out of our comfort zone and into something hard we are actively in the fear zone. Survival instincts engaged. But the strong? They get stronger because of it.

They enter the fear zone knowing exactly where they are, expecting mistakes to be made, negative thoughts to rise, and instead of fighting them.

They embrace them and get stronger because of it. It's a leveled up way of thinking. 

And you know where this starts? Practice.

The players who practice making mistakes, living in the fear zone, and opting for the leveled up approach will implement in games. The next play after every mistake will be viewed as a fresh start. To try something new. And the growth in this space will be the difference maker for athletes. Not the skill at hand necessarily. But rather the leveled up mindset.

So the next time you mess up (and you will mess up again and again and again...) get your flashlight out and be curious with how your body and mind react.

Ask yourself these 2 simple questions... 

Do you like it?

Is it helping you? 

If the answer to those 2 questions are no, then remember you have choices. One will lock potential up and the other will provide the keys to unlock.

Leveled up thinking isn't easy but it is so worth it.

Choose wisely.

In Your Corner,

Nikki